Originally appeared on E! Online
Erin Andrews is giving a difficult personal update.
The sportscaster, who has been open about her fertility struggles over the years, shared that she and husband Jarret Stoll received sad news amid their journey to expand to a family of four.
“I didn’t want to do this podcast today,” Andrews tearfully admitted on the May 22 episode of “Calm Down with Erin and Charissa.” “I’ve realized throughout my life with everything I’ve gone through, adversity, sometimes this is such a great safe space.“
Indeed, Andrews, mom to 2-year-old Mack, went on to detail how she had always used her and Charissa Thompson’s show to talk through her struggles, particularly with fertility, so she felt comfortable sharing a difficult update.
“We got some really s—– news today,” she continued. “That our surrogate had miscarried. So, I have dealt with this before but things were going really, really well and her little heartbeat and her numbers were really good, so I even told you guys a couple weeks ago because we thought we had such good news.“
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And while Andrews, 47, noted her producer Ryan Musick was an excellent co-host for the day with Thompson away, she admitted she had been “tearing up the whole time” over the devastating news.
“I’m also really, really good at suppressing my feelings and work really helps me with that,” she added. “I think one of the things I’m so sad about is I’m going to have to do a better job with dealing with my feelings with this because the last time we had such loss I didn’t, and I suffered with it.“
Andrews admitted that Taylor Swift was somewhat helping her through the struggle.
“I’ve been thinking about that Taylor Swift song ‘I Can Do It With A Broken Heart,'” she explained. “I’m really good at doing it with a broken heart. I think I kind of made a promise to myself that when I was really open with how s—– infertility has been — I decided I would be honest about this.“
As she put it, “This really, really sucks so if you feel alone and if you feel like a failure, I do too.“
Still, Andrews, who wed Stoll in 2017, has previously shared that all of the struggle is worth welcoming a baby, and she’s felt that reward with little Mack.
“There’s a lot of PTSD from the loss that we’ve had,” Andrews told E! News in March, “but we also know the end result is really fun.”
Erin Andrews is a mom. After a 9-year-long fertility journey, the sportscaster and her husband Jarret Stoll have welcomed their first child, a baby boy via surrogate, the couple’s rep confirmed to “Today.”